Toni is a parent carer looking after her sons, who have autism and ADHD. The day-to-day demands of caring can be intense, with meltdowns, distractions and constant challenges leaving Toni feeling stressed, tired and emotionally drained.
Toni first heard about Essex Carers Support through a friend, who knew how much she was struggling following her child’s diagnosis.
“They see me on a daily basis and see the struggles I have with my little one, so they knew just how much I needed some support.”
Toni made a referral and was then put in touch with her local Carer Support Worker. Having someone take the time to listen and understand what life was really like for Toni gave her the chance to talk openly about the emotional impact of her caring role and what she needed to feel more able to cope.
Finding support that worked for Toni
Toni knew she needed time for herself but finding that time was difficult. She wanted a chance to step away from the pressures of daily caring, recharge and look after her own wellbeing.
Her Carer Support Worker talked with her about different ways she could get support, including counselling and connecting with other parent carers who understood the challenges she was facing.
Toni was referred to our free counselling service and is now waiting for face-to-face counselling. She was also given information about local carer groups and other organisations supporting parent carers.
The conversations also helped Toni recognise that taking time for herself was not something she should feel guilty about. It was something she needed.
With the summer holidays approaching, Toni decided to apply for a Time4You grant to help pay for a spa break.
A much-needed chance to stop and breathe
The grant came at a particularly important time. Toni had recently been in hospital herself and was feeling emotionally and physically exhausted.
She used her grant towards a weekend spa break for two – giving her the chance to step away from her caring responsibilities, rest and focus on herself.
Afterwards, Toni shared:
“The support came at a time when I genuinely felt like I was at breaking point, and it honestly couldn’t have come at a better time.”
“Sometimes you don’t realise just how much you need a break until you finally get one.”
For Toni, the break was about more than a weekend away. It gave her something to look forward to and, importantly, permission to put herself first for a little while.
“At a time when I felt emotionally and physically exhausted, this grant gave me something to look forward to and, most importantly, gave me permission to take a little time for myself without feeling guilty.”
Toni also appreciated the practical and emotional support she received from her Carer Support Worker, including being helped to find the right support for her mental wellbeing.
“Thank you, for giving me that much-needed time to breathe, relax and reset.”
You don’t have to manage caring on your own
Toni’s caring role is still part of everyday life, but she now has support around her and knows where to turn when things feel too much.
Her story shows that sometimes a conversation, the right advice or a small amount of support to take a break can make a real difference to a carer’s wellbeing.
Whatever stage of your caring journey you are at, you don’t have to manage it alone. Our friendly team can offer information, advice and support, connect you with other organisations and groups, and help you explore options to give you some much-needed time for yourself.
If caring is taking its toll, reach out to us. We’re here to listen and help. 💙
